that chunk of cacah

Toni Stone                                             Aug. 26, 2003
401 Buck Hollow Road
Fairfax, VT 05454

that chunk of cacah

if people told nothing but the truth, that is if everyone said what was so in the moment for them, instead of smiling and agreeing. . .almost everyone would let you know that right after the excitement of something new wears off. . .it is boring or it is hard work and no one really prefers those units.

and, so the hell what? i don’t know anything that didn’t have a big chunk of that in it. that chunk of cacah takes up the most space between the beginning and the end of any great accomplishment, any great relationship, any terrific project.

the beginning: high excitement.
the middle: hard work.
the end: good, victorious feelings.

the center is always the place where i have to pull myself up to the next highest level, and mostly i love to stay where i was, where it’s comfortable,
where i already know everything.
of course, it’s easier there. . .
that chunk in the middle, where i labor without knowing if it will be worth it. . .
that’s where i live in faith, labor in optimism and vision that it is working,
even before i can see it.
that’s called expectancy.
expectancy goes hand-in-hand with commitment.
they are roommates.